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Stop Saying Men Are More Responsible for Domestic Violence Than Women

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Contrary to years of alarming reports by the media focused only on domestic violence by men, women actually commit more domestic violence incidents than men. But the UN ran a global campaign this winter titled, “Orange the World: End Violence Against Women Now!”The  description of the drive made frequent references to “violence against women and girls,” but did not include any mention of “violence against men and boys.”

 

Multiple studies of domestic violence have found that slightly more men than women report being a victim of domestic violence within the past year, 19.8% to 18.8%. Last year, the Coalition to End Domestic Violence issued a report entitled “Thirty-Years of Domestic Violence Half-Truths, Falsehoods and Lies” which revealed massive amounts of bias in this area.

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Much of the perception that domestic violence is mainly perpetuated by men against women developed in the 1990s, when then-Sen. Joe Biden drafted the “Violence Against Women Act.” Despite all the taxpayer money thrown at the program, there is little or no evidence that VAWA-funded programs have succeeded in reducing rates of domestic violence.

 

And according to commentator Christina Villegas, protecting persons from partner abuse “has never been the primary intention of VAWA.” Instead, the domestic violence campaign has been a “political movement that seeks to change social norms and redistribute resources, power, and control to women, with the long-term aim of a genderless, socialist society.”

 

Another stereotype that persists also began in the 1990s: “More women are victims of domestic violence on Super Bowl Sunday than on any other day of the year.” Even the left-wing Snopes fact-checking site labeled that false. Snopes explained, “The claim that Super Bowl Sunday is ‘the biggest day of the year for violence against women’ is a case study of how easily an idea congruous with what people want to believe can be implanted in the public consciousness and anointed as ‘fact’ even when there is little or no supporting evidence behind it.”

 

Longtime leading feminist Gloria Steinem once declared, “The most dangerous situation for a woman is … a husband or lover in the isolation of their home.” This is false. According to the Centers for Disease Control, the leading causes of injury deaths for women are falls, followed by poisonings and then traffic accidents.

 

The left-wing dominated legal system is responsible for much of the misinformation. The website of the DOJ Office of Violence Against Women was found to contain massive misinformation. It was so bad that all of the inaccurate fact sheets were removed by 2021. 

 

However, some false data remains on another DOJ website, the Office for Victims of Crime, in a document entitled “Facts About Domestic Violence.” Based on on findings from the

National Crime Victimization Survey, it incorrectly relates the same inaccurately compiled, tired old statistics.

 

The International Association of Chiefs of Police mostly ignores the fact that domestic violence is perpetrated against men too. The National District Attorneys Association is almost as bad. National Council of Juvenile and Family Court Judges issued a pamphlet entitled “Bringing the Greenbook to Life: A Resource Guide for Communities,” which contains the words “battered mothers” and “battered women” 27 times, but not a single instance of  “battered fathers” or “battered men.” 

 

The American Bar Association issued a two-page flyer, “10 Myths about Custody and Domestic Violence and How to Counter Them.” The Coalition to End Domestic Violence found, “Overall, the great majority of assertions and conclusions in the CODV flyer were found to be unsupported, misleading, or wrong.” Not surprisingly, the ABA took the paper down; but not before it was posted on the Leadership Council on Child Abuse and Interpersonal Violence website. 

 

Perhaps the reason this myth is perpetuated is because of the outdated perception that women are helpless to defend themselves from men. Times have changed. Women can call 911, own guns, learn martial arts to defend themselves, and use the deterrent threat of shaming on social media and through the regular media. Of course there are exceptions to all of that where a woman may be unable to utilize any of those — but there are also situations where a man may be unable to defend himself from a woman, such as situations where she is stronger or has a weapon and he doesn’t. 

 

The bias is a problem because it promotes harmful stereotypes of men. Instead of being the protectors of women, they are viewed as abusers and predators. It makes women unnecessarily scared to have relationships with men, and puts men on eggshells dating women. It also makes men less likely to contact law enforcement for help with domestic violence — which then perpetuates the myth that they aren’t —  a vicious cycle. The numbers of men who contact services for help are drastically smaller than women — as much as 99 to 1 in areas such as legal assistance, sexual assault services and transitional living services. 

 

Contrary to a popular stereotype, black men are more likely than black women to be victims of domestic violence. Mandatory domestic violence arrest policies likely result in disproportionate arrest rates among black men.  

 

Women are also more likely than men to be involved in abuse of their children. They commit 53% of child abuse incidents, and mothers are responsible for 71% of child homicides committed by a parent. 

 

Unfortunately, researchers who attempt to refute the misleading claims are targeted by activists. The late Professor Suzanne Steinmetz published a book showing that men and women commit domestic violence at approximately equal rates. For this, a letter writing campaign was launched to deny her promotion and tenure at the University of Delaware, and her daughter’s wedding received a bomb threat.

 

Finally, during the COVID-19 epidemic there were wild claims that being stuck at home has increased domestic violence. But four different studies found this was not true. 

 

What is it going to take to stop this hurtful stereotype from being perpetuated? People daring to speak up and say enough, especially leaders and men who have been hurt. 

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Rachel Alexander is a conservative political writer and pundit. She is the editor of Intellectual Conservative and a recovering attorney. She was ranked by Right Wing News as one of the 50 Best Conservative Columnists from 2011-2019.



 
 
 

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Faith

A Nation of Unsung Heroes

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The movie, Unsung Hero, is not only a great movie. It’s a movie that captures the struggle and hard-earned survival and eventual success of millions of Americans who have had to overcome struggles to earn their own American Dream. For two centuries, Americans have been known for their resourcefulness and resilience, and we are not done yet!

We are again living in difficult and challenging times. Surveys suggest that nearly 60% of American families are living paycheck to paycheck. Their solutions to their plight won’t be coming from politicians in Washington. Their success, as always, depends on their will and resourcefulness in overcoming daily obstacles, their ability to survive on limited resources, their scrounging for work that allows them to survive another day, and help from those who care.

That common but heart-rending struggle is conveyed in an inspiring way in Unsung Hero. The film focuses on the early struggles of the Smallbone family in the early 90’s. We watch as David Smallbone’s once-thriving music business as a concert promoter in Australia falls apart. They lose their home, their car, and their life’s savings. With no opportunities in Australia, David moves the family halfway around the world to Nashville to secure the only job he could secure. After missed flights and a long and tiring journey to Tennessee, David learns that his promised job had been given to someone else.

As their dreams fall apart, you watch as the steady faith and creativity of Helen Smallbone, played by Australian actress and mother Daisy Betts, pulls the family through one setback and challenge after another to find a way through. With six children and another on the way, every member of the family is challenged to do their part to keep them afloat. They do yard work, any work that would fill their jar of savings. They couldn’t let it be empty, and they didn’t. They kept finding a way.

They were Australians with no friends, no family, no car, sleeping on beds made out of clothes. To nurture their faith, they began attending a local church. Aware of their needs, church members found ways to help in any way they could. In a foreign country living in a city with over half-a million people, it took finding a loving faith community who cared enough to help. Watch the movie, to find out the rest of the story. Bring plenty of tissue and be ready for a few tears along the way.

America needs this movie right now. Why? Too many people are feeling hopeless in the face of growing inflation and lost jobs. They face frustrating obstacles and enormous challenges, and the answer is summed up by a quotation of Mother Teresa shared in the movie, “If you want to change the world, go home and love your family.” Luke Smallbone, the producer of the film, acknowledged the importance of that truth, “That is really the heartbeat behind the film.” It is also the local solution that has always helped Americans find their way through-the power of family and the presence and support of their local “family of God.”

Washington may send you money, but they can’t provide the flexible and persistent support needed. It’s one’s local family, friends, and faith communities who can encourage resilience and help shape a needed recovery. Solutions come from a local community’s caring and support. It used to always be that way, and it needs to be that way again.

Our nation is full of unsung heroes who are helping their family and friends, and they are more needed than ever. If you don’t have anyone helping you, stop looking to Washinton for the help that will never come no matter who is elected President. Get involved again in your family and your community. Call your family and let them know you need help. Get back involved in your church or synagogue and let God work through them to help you get back on your feet. Investing in community is an adventure that allows you to help and be helped to the glory of God and country.

When you get involved, you most likely will not make any headlines. That is left for terrorists, violent demonstrators, and other disasters and threats out of your control. But America is strong because of millions of unsung heroes who make it all work and seldom get acknowledged. This column is dedicated to you. You deserve to be honored and applauded for all you have done and will do to keep America the country it has been and must remain. May it continue to be so in your adventure!
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Family

More Breathing Space Tips for January

Time flies, but you can stay in control

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A week of the new year and of the new month has passed. What other Breathing Space tips will help give you a sense of control?

[ ] On each trip to the supermarket, shop for at least two food items that are new to you or your family.

[ ] Eat in-season fruits that are high in citrus and bioflavonoids, such as oranges, grapefruit, and tangerines. You need your Vitamin C in the winter! Also, take a multivitamin.

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[ ] Tackle all household repair jobs before spring. Handle one project per week.

[ ] If the roads are clear, take one new route from work each week.

[ ] Enroll in a course at your local college, and take advantage of mid-afternoon or evening time slots. Most evening classes are smaller, allowing for more class discussion and individual attention.

[ ] Take advantage of all the post-holiday bargains. Buy in bulk and buy off-season items when the price is right.

[ ] Go ahead and schedule that spa treatment you’ve been wanting to take.

[ ] Give your body a treat, go to sleep early at least one night per week.

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