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How Black Mothers Will Save Our Nation

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It is widely accepted that the absence of fathers in homes leads to many of society’s problems and dramatically increases the odds of a child growing into a dysfunctional adult. Crime statistics can be directly correlated to homes where there is no father present. Income level is not the causation, race is not the cause, parental guidance is. Kids who grow up with only their father’s guidance and nurturing are also missing a vital life component.

Absentee fathers is an epidemic among black communities in America.

Decades of policies and entitlement programs have openly discouraged dual parent homes among America’s lowest income groups. Welfare checks flowed to homes where Dad was missing. So Moms realized that it didn’t pay well to keep Dad around and fathers were evidently OK with the freedom from responsibility, at first.

If you were to conclude that fathers were more influential than mothers, you would be wrong. Just watch a male sports star who gets a moment on camera. He will almost always mouth “Hi Mom!” or thank his Mother for inspiring him.  But a mother is only half a parent, she’s the Yin and humans also need the Yang, Dad. Can a woman fill both roles? No, but she can try to and may fill part of the void. That’s a big help but not a solution. This is not just true for humans, it is present throughout nature. Testosterone and Estrogen need each other.

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It is also well documented that children from families who attend church regularly are far less likely to commit crimes, drop out of school, join gangs, or cause societal problems. This is regardless of race or income level. Those who “pray together stay together.”

In the 1950s, 60s and 70s, if you misbehaved anywhere in America you would be disciplined by your Momma. They’d tell you, “If you get a spanking at school, you’ll get a worse one when you get home! Don’t misbehave.” If someone saw you doing bad things, they’d say, “Child, don’t you do that. I know your Momma.” Daddy may have been scarier when he spanked you with a belt, but Momma was terrifying with whatever discipline she wielded.

One of the best voices for integrity and black advancement in America today is Candace Owens. Many more are needed.

The following is from a recent article by author L. Todd Wood:

Do Black Lives Matter?
It is your job to determine if this is a racist rant or just a review of factual data…
 
WHAT IF ALL THE BLACKS SUDDENLY LEFT AMERICA, WHICH IS 13.3% OF THE TOTAL U.S.POPULATION:
Amount of people in poverty would drop – 34%,
The prison population would go down by -37%,
Welfare recipients would go down by – – – 42%,
Gang members would go down by – – – – – 53%
Chlamydia cases would go down – – – – – – 54%,
Homelessness would go down – – – – – – – -57%
Syphilis would go down  – – – – – –  – – – – -58%.
AIDS & HIV would go down by – – – – – – – – -65%,
Gonorrhea would go down – – – – – – – – – – -69%,
Average ACT scores would go UP – – – – – – – – 5.5 points.
Average IQ would go UP – – – – – – – – – – – – -7.4 points,  putting us 3rd in the world tied with Japan,
Average SAT scores would go UP almost – – – – -100 points,
The average income for Americans would go UP over $20,000 a year,
BUT DEMOCRATS WOULD LOSE 76% OF THEIR VOTING BASE!!!
And, many criminal defense attorneys would have to find another line of work!
 
Yes, Black lives DO matter!
If those same black people stayed in America but changed their family and community culture then the same improvements would happen. This isn’t about race. It is about culture. Of course, Black Lives Matter. But you wouldn’t think so if you looked at it through the lens of the news media. They would lead you to believe that blacks are eternal victims and whites are eternal oppressors, period. They have no interest in solving problems, that would leave them with nothing sensational to report.

Skin color isn’t important. Culture is what makes the difference.

Blacks have broken every barrier known to man, mostly in America. Politics, entertainment, wealth, business, philosophy, education, sports, leadership, medicine, journalism, science, and name it, they have reached the top of the top in each.
But, the black subculture in America’s main cities is a culture of perpetual poverty and victimhood. Community organizers and even “reverends” like Jeremiah Wright in Chicago or Al Sharpton don’t preach the gospel of Christianity, instead they spew hatred, blame, and accusation. They don’t encourage their parishioners to become better people. Instead they cultivate a victim mindset and a “get-even” focus. Forgiveness is not taught, judgment is demanded.

The 70’s chant “I’m Black and I’m Proud!” has been replaced by “I’m Black and You Owe Me!”

The same mentality can be seen in any community where poverty has endured. White people like that have been called “White Trash”, and other races have their own special insulting names. It’s not about skin. It is about culture.

I say let’s return to the “Black and Proud” mentality.

Let’s all start taking pride again in our work, our integrity, our nation, our family, our schools, our faith, our friends, our flag, our talents, our education, and our personal behavior.
But somebody has to lead the charge. Someone has to start making church, education, good manners, cleanliness, lawfulness, respect for elders and authorities, and generosity important again.

I say it will be the Mothers who save America.

Famous motivational speaker Dr. Kenneth McFarland was once asked by an audience member, “Dr. McFarland, I’m not in business. I’m only a mother and a housewife. What good can I do?”
His response was brilliant and accurate. He said, “Madam, if you don’t do your job right, it won’t matter what the rest of us do!” All societal healing begins in the home.

Mothers are our First Responders.

They are the Emergency Medical Technicians. They are the safety officers, the counsellors, and even the community organizers. They are the primary educators, the drill sergeants, and occasionally, the jailers.
We need for Momma to get that switch down off the shelf and remind her children that they’d better “straighten up and fly right.”
We need a resurgence of discipline in the home. Don’t talk back, don’t waste food, clean up after yourself, leave things better than you found them. Do your chores. Chores and learning are your job until you are on your own. Watch out for your younger brother or sister. Take pride in your home. Help your Mother in the kitchen and around the house. Learn to be a good parent some day by watching your own parents do their best.
We need Mom and Dad to go to church every Sunday and take the kids along, like it or not…at first.
We need Mom to stand at the door and shoo away the mean kids or gang members trying to recruit Junior.
Mom needs to be the one who swats her child the instant they use profanity. Tell them to learn proper English so the rest of the world will know that you “matter.” Tell them to dress intelligently. Dress to look like you belong where you want to be, not just where you are today. Tell them to sit up straight, walk tall, look people in the eye. Say “yes sir and yes ma’am.” “Say you are sorry and mean it.” “Stop whining and solve the problem.” Teach them to shake hands and show respect to all people, especially those who don’t usually get it.
Mothers need to tell the preachers, “We come here to hear the gospel, and be inspired to be better people. If you’re not preaching Love, we’re finding another church.”
Mothers need to tell the schools, “My child isn’t learning how to live a rewarding life. Stop trying to convince them that they should never be made to feel uncomfortable! I don’t care if they are uncomfortable as long as they are learning how to make a good living and be a good citizen.”
Mothers need to smile at the police and thank them for keeping us all safe. They need to know the policeman’s name and develop trust with them. Give them a fresh baked cookie once in awhile.

Mothers should be our nation’s first line of Law Enforcement. 

Tell your kids, “There will be none of my children at marches for a martyred criminal regardless how tragic their death may have been.” Tell them, “Sympathize and show respect but don’t get mad and demonstrate unless it will do some good. Screaming hatred, looting, rioting, vandalizing, attacking, these are the behaviors of criminals. And criminals belong in prison.”
“Stop listening to music that isn’t music. When it is just Hatred With A Beat, stop it! Don’t disrespect women and call them names, don’t disrespect police and call them names, don’t disrespect your own race and call us names. We don’t allow those words in this house!”
When Mothers stand up so will our Nation! Stand up for what is right. Stand up for what is good. Stand up for our Flag. Stand up for dignity, pride, and integrity. And Dads, go home and be a Father. Make America Good Again!

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Jim Cathcart, CSP, CPAE is an Executive MBA Professor, Author of 21 books, Hall of Fame Professional Speaker, Top 1% TEDx video (2.4 million views), US Army veteran, Singer/Songwriter, and Lifelong Motorcyclist. He is known as "Your Virtual VP" for his Advisory/Mentor work with organizations worldwide. Based in Texas...and proud of it!



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Life

Too Tired for Your Own Good

The realization that you are fatigued is the first step to resolution

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It’s Sunday. Go back to bed and then return to this article!

Based on what you do an average day, it is understandable that sometimes you feel very tired, but when is the tired feeling that you have bordering on danger? Many signs exist, among them these:

    1. Your fatigue is prolonged. Getting several nights of extra sleep in a row or sleeping for an entire weekend doesn’t seem to put a dent in your feeling of fatigue. Perhaps worse, you feel as if you “will never catch up.”
    2. You experience indigestion or lack of appetite. You normally look forward to meals, but when highly fatigued, you have trouble getting them down. Maybe, you’re eating less.
    3. Loss of sex drive. This isn’t as obvious a sign as you might think. Loss of your libido usually takes place a little bit at a time, such that you don’t notice what’s going on. Your partner probably will, though.
    4. You begin to experience trouble getting to sleep, if not outright insomnia. During the night, you find yourself waking more often or tossing back and forth, and then to exacerbate the situation, you spend the rest of the night worrying that you’re not getting good sleep.
    5. You feel tired in the morning even after getting a full night’s sleep. Realistically, there’s no reason for this. If by 9:30 or 10:00 in the morning, you can hardly keep your head up, it’s time to take heed.
    6. Your ability to focus on the task at hand is diminished. Your powers of concentration are not what they have been in the past. Generally, this is not due to your aging.
    7. You feel that you’re no longer in control. In many ways, this is the most insidious of the signs. You doze at highly inopportune moments, such as in an important meeting, or when driving.

Not Enough Sleep, but Otherwise Functional

Here’s a second list of indicators showing that you’re not getting enough sleep, but perhaps you’re not at the danger level:

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  • Your eyes are red.
  • You’re not mentally sharp.
  • You avoid tasks that involve adding up numbers.
  • You find yourself daydreaming often.
  • In situations with others you simply go through the motions.
  • You don’t want to handle any phone calls if you can help it.
  • You watch the clock frequently throughout the day, hoping it will go by more quickly.

Before I learned how to keep my stress level in check, I used to look forward to going to the dentist. When I got to the dentist’s chair, and they tilted the seat back, it was one of the few times during the day where I actually reclined and had relatively little to do. If there wasn’t to be any drilling or serious poking during the session, such as a routine visit or cleaning, in some cases I became so relaxed that I didn’t want to leave. For me, that was an indication that I was highly fatigued.

You probably have your own personal corollaries to this. The realization that you are fatigued is the first step to increasing your efficiency and defeating the problem.  A life of constant exhaustion, no matter what else you accomplish, is not a desirable situation. No one, however, is coming to bail you out.

The road back from exhaustion starts with self-awareness, then resolve, then action. Will today be that day?

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Life

Work-life Balance and the Five-Mega-Realities

Work-life balance is the ability to experience a sense of control and to stay productive and competitive at work while maintaining a happy, healthy home life with needed leisure

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In the 1st edition of my book Breathing Space which appeared in 1990, I discussed five major trends – what I called mega-realities – that influenced every aspect of our being, and from which no one was immune. Briefly, these five mega-realities include:

* an expanding volume of knowledge
* mass media growth and electronic addiction
* the paper trail culture
* an over-abundance of choices
* population growth.

Knowledge – In one way or another, everyone fears being under-informed. The enormous volume of new knowledge broadcasted and published in every field exceeds our ability to keep pace. More words are published and broadcast in a day than you could ingest during your lifetime. America leads the world in sheer volume of information generated and disseminated.

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The impasse of this over-information era is that the time necessary to learn the rules for effective living now exceeds your lifetime. This is why management books so often miss the mark: they list dozens — if not hundreds — of rules, when you are already grappling with more rules than you can handle.

Mass Media – The effect of the mass media on our lives continues unchecked. More than four out of five American households own DVD players. In 1972, three major television networks dominated television – ABC, NBC and CBS. Now, there are more than 500 full-power independent television stations. Many cable TV subscribers receive up to 200 channels that offer more than 72,000 shows per month.

With its sensationalized trivia, the mass media glut obscures fundamental issues that do merit concern, such as preserving the environment or feeding the poor.

Paper Trails – Like having too much data and eyewitness reports, having too much paper to deal with makes you feel overwhelmed and overworked. Americans today are consuming three times as much paper as ten years ago. There are two basic reasons why society spews so much paper:

* We have the lowest postal rates in the world.
* We have the widest base of paper-generating technologies.

The typical executive receives more than 200 pieces of unsolicited mail each month – about 12 pieces daily. The average family receives more than 100 catalogs that they did not request, on top of those they did request.

An Overabundance of Choices – Having choices is a blessing of the free market economy, but it’s overwhelming, increases time expenditure, and is a mounting form of exhaustion. More than 1,260 varieties of shampoo are on the market. More than 2,000 skin-care products are for sale. An excess of 75 different types of exercise shoes are available, each with scores of variations in style, function, and features.

Population – From the beginning of creation to 1,850 AD, world population grew to one billion. It grew to two billion by 1930, and is now approaching eight billion. Every three years, nearly 250,000,000 people are added to the planet.

Each day, world population (births minus deaths) increases by more than 265,000 people. Geometric growth in human population permeates and dominates every aspect of our earth, its resources, the environment, and all living things.

The Quest for Work-life Balance

Against this backdrop, the quest for work-life balance is more vital than ever. Predictably, a preponderance of speakers, trainers, authors, journalists, and others whose professions entail regular communication with the masses, proclaim the virtues of achieving and maintaining work-life balance.

However, a glaring question arises. What, exactly, is work-life balance? Compared to the legions of instances in which the term is cited, surprisingly little has been written in articles and books about what the concept actually entails.

During my 33 years in pursuit of understanding why the pace of society has sped up, what the impact has been on the typical individual, and how each of us can forge our own sense and experience of breathing space throughout our lives, I have honed and refined the tenets of what I consider work-life balance.

What Exactly is Work-life Balance ?

For several years now, those who apparently have no idea what work-life balance is and have virtually never experienced it are proclaiming that it is passe — in favor of work-life harmony or work-life integration.

The truth is, these terms all mean approximately the same things. You can split hairs anyway you want, and I suppose that’s a good way to differentiate a program if you’re seeking to offer one to clients, but the reality is work-life balance is the overarching issue of our time that all career professionals strive to achieve.

Work-life balance is the ability to experience a sense of control and to stay productive and competitive at work while maintaining a happy, healthy home life with sufficient leisure. It is attaining focus and awareness, despite seemingly endless tasks and activities competing for your time and attention.

Work-life balance entails having some breathing space for yourself each day; feeling a sense of accomplishment, while not being consumed by work; and having an enjoyable domestic life without short-changing career obligations. It is rooted in whatever fulfillment means to you within 24-hour days, seven-day weeks, and however many years you have left.

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